Dennis Cole asked:


Anger management is a learned skill, so it is more common in youngsters and teens, who have not learned good coping skills to deal with their anger. Should you feel you are at risk of losing your temper in a way that could harm you, or others, you should always seek professional help. Ask your parents, pastor, physician, school counselor, or a trusted, responsible friend for help.

Whether it is road rage, a provoked emotional outpouring of anger, or losing your temper over something silly, every one of us have lost our tempers at one time or another. Anger management only becomes an issue when we are no longer able to control our anger, and have destructive outbursts. A destructive outburst does not necessarily mean that you have broken something, or physically hurt someone, as a manifestation of your anger, it just means that, because of your inability to control your angry responses to a real or perceived stimulus, you have done something harmful to someone, something, or even to yourself.

When your anger controls you, you may feel you are at the mercy of something that you can not control. Anger can cause you to do things you normally would never do, and even things you could regret for the rest of your life. Anger can even affect your physical well-being in more ways than one. Studies have shown that anger causes your heart rate and blood pressure to rise. Hormones, like adrenaline and noradrenaline, also rise when you are angry. Anger can push you backwards emotionally, into the cave men era, when the fight or flight response was the only way to stay alive in an uncivilized world, so not only does uncontrolled anger effect your life in the areas of your personal relationships with others, it effects you physically as well.

In order to develop good anger management techniques, you must first understand what provokes anger, and the bodys natural response to anger. Anger is precipitated by the bodys natural chemical responses to increased physical arousal, emotions, and accompanying behaviors, that result when a person feels threatened, or perceives a threat or loss. The threat does not necessarily have to be a threat of personal, physical harm. It can be a threat to their self-esteem, when they believe their feelings are challenged or discounted by another.

The body naturally responds to any perceived threat by producing adrenalin to prepare for “fight or flight.” How a particular person responds to these threats is due, in large, to how they have been conditioned as a child or learned later in life, whether with good anger management techniques or negative ones. Many abuse victims are conditioned to respond violently, and learn verbal, mental, or physically abusive behaviors from others, and never develop positive anger management techniques.

Every person alive has triggers that set off their anger. Here are the most common reasons people become angry:

- A threat to their values (disagreeing with something someone is doing, such as kicking a dog, or not following the rules)

- When someone insists they do something they don’t want to do

- When someone hurts or betrays them, and they feel a loss of trust

- When they attempt to escape guilty feelings over something they do not want to feel or admit to themselves

- When they believe their feelings are discounted, and their sense of self esteem is compromised

- When expectations are not met (realistic, or unrealistic expectations) and they don’t get their way

School shootings, physical violence among families, friends, associates, and loved ones, are proof and manifestations of the fact that poor anger management is on the rise. Whether you blame the increase in anger related crimes, such as assault, murder, rape, physical and emotional abuse, on a lack of parental supervision, violence in video games or television, or other causes, the manifestations of poor anger management are becoming more and more commonplace, and increasing numbers of people are seeking professional help to gain control of the destructive effects of poor anger management.

Both internal and external events can cause anger. Anger can be directed at a specific person (a friend, teacher, or parent) an event (academic challenges, loss of a loved one) or by frustration or worry over personal problems. There are many common causes for anger in school. Young people are easily frustrated and become angry when faced with difficult challenges. It is hard not to get angry when you feel you do not fit in, do not understand an assignment or project, when you fail a test, or fail to reach a goal. Frustration can lead to anger. Many students get angry at their parents or teachers, because they don’t feel the rules are fair. Sometimes anger occurs, without even knowing exactly why you are angry. There are times it cannot be controlled and this is when we should seek help.

The worst thing you can do is deny your anger. While you want to learn to manage your anger, so that your anger does not cause you to do harmful things to yourself or others, when you hold your feelings inside, they can lead to an explosion, and the only way to prevent that, is to learn good anger management techniques.

Mature people try to practice positive ways to deal with their anger in an argument. One positive way to deal with anger against loved ones is to make a contract that they can leave during a fight, whenever they feel that they might lose control. Just go to a private place for time out. In private they do damage control techniques like waiting out the initial rush of the anger, and trying to think from the other persons viewpoint, to bring their anger level down and then return to deal with the problem.

Accepting that you have an anger prone personality and recognizing the need to actively work toward anger management in order to live a happier life, makes the difference in managing anger successfully. A commitment to study and take parenting classes to seek more effective ways of disciplining their children, taking anger management classes, and participating in couples counseling, helps to learn better ways of being with the people they work and live with.

Some people with high degrees of frustration keep tabs on themselves and work at diffusing their anger responses. They will use positive anger management methods; because their conscience tells them that their outbursts hurt others. Some people recognize that they are acting out angry responses they learned from their own parents, and sending that legacy down to their own children. Some get help because their partner gives them the ultimatum of threatening to leave them if they do not get help. A few get help only after they lose their spouse and families, but sadly, some never learn anger management methods that could save their families, if not their own lives.



Susan

Jake J Saab asked:


It may be difficult for an individual, no matter what age, to admit they need help in controlling their problem with anger. However this is the initial step to treatment and learning how to control these emotions. Effective anger management help is assistance in discovering methods or strategies for managing anger problems or if fortunate enough, eliminating them all together. Effective anger management help will equip an individual to face their anger issues with a better attitude, as well as develop skills to control their reactions to confrontational situations.

Three common reactions to a stressful or irritating situation are bottling up emotions, getting defensive or lashing out. Neither of these reactions is healthy or a solution to managing anger issues. When an individual decides to bottle up their emotions of anger instead of seeking anger management help, there can be several negative consequences. Bottling up anger may be okay for the moment but the individual will soon discover the problem does not go away. Refusing to deal with the situation may eventually unleash negative thoughts which cause the individual to become even angrier. Bottled up anger can also transform into resentment which can last for an eternity. Without dealing with the problem, a person may accept the blame and guilt, causing them to feel discouraged and bad about themselves. Effective anger management help would help an individual work on these attempts to cope with challenging situations.

Getting defensive is a common reaction for people who have problems controlling their temper. Reacting quickly to upsetting encounters without considering the repercussions is normal for people with anger issues. Acting on raw emotions of hurt or pain will produce very hostile reactions and likely promote hostile responses. This is not effective in dealing with such situations. Effect anger management help would encourage people not to be defensive but rather evaluate situations before acting on them.

Situations which provoke anger often cause people to lash out. Using physical or verbal aggressions, individuals act on impulse. These negative impulsive reactions produce negative consequences and usually results which are later regretted. It is easy for an angry person to lash out but it is not quite so easy to find positive results from such behavior. Lashing out doesn’t resolve problems, rather causes more problems. In the end an individual will realize that their rash behavior didn’t solve a thing. Effective anger management help will teach the individual to control their anger and restrain from lashing out.

Anger management help can be effective if people are serious and dedicated to working on their problems. There are many sources of anger management help available today, much of it free to interested individuals. It is essential for people with anger problems to realize their need for anger management help. Until they are ready to accept responsibility for their actions and choose to make a difference, anger management help will not be effective. Committing to an anger management program will ultimately help an individual to effectively control their temper and logically handle confrontational situations.



Melinda

Brittny M asked:


I got in trouble and i eathier had to do 3 mo alcohol classes or anger management i now i don’t have a drinking problem so of course anger problems…lol… so i have to do it for 3 months! and have court again in february in 2010 and if i don’t do it i go to jail for possiably a year. so i need to know how much it is for 3 months or an esstimate would be nice. thanks! i just want to have an idea…. about how much it would cost

Jon

Stephen Campbell asked:


Anger management techniques are put in place to give encouragement to individuals to work on their anger. Anger management programs are generally educational in nature and help the victim to take control of their emotions– the anger. The fact of the matter is that when you get angry, you give your emotions charge over you.

You know that you are expressing your anger appropriately when you are able to talk without yelling when you are angry– self control. You should seek for anger management help if you reach for a breakable vase to demolish every time you are angry. Anger needs to be expressed in the right way for it to be viewed positively and so it can not do any damage– severe is fatal damage.

Anger can be managed as long as you program realistic goals for yourself. Anger management need a great deal of patience and determination if you want to overcome it. Anger management programs help to foster patience in you towards your anger problem.

An effective method of helping employee at work manage anger issues is to enroll them in anger management classes available in your community. Employees who learn how to express their anger will eventually become a great asset to the company– studies show. If you are a business owner, you should never underestimate the effect an anger management class can have on your employees.

Do you know that anger can be such a joy killer? You may have been all bright and chirpy in one minute, and angry the next minute so be aware of it to put a control. Staying happy is not as easy as getting angry and demands a lot of work. But the truth is that if others have effectively utilized anger management techniques to get control of your anger, you can as well– if you put yourself to it.

If you are angry in most times, you have an anger management problem. I do not care what anybody tells you, but this is the truth. Being angry most of the time is not an acceptable behavior. It affects not only you but the individuals around you as well. You can help enhance relationships and make a calm climate by mastering your anger as much as you can and as many times as possible.

Learning and understanding all about anger can help you understand its destructive potential. If you don’t know how to, consider attending anger management classes. Anger management classes teach you what anger can do if it is not controlled. The more you learn about anger, the less you will get angry.

You can overcome anger by preventing any accumulation of feelings. Your thinking can be impaired when you get angry recklessly. Expressing yourself immediately you feel angry can help you feel lighter and freer.



Phillip

Abhishek Agarwal asked:


People of all ages definitely need help when it comes to controlling their anger. Admitting that you have an anger problem is the first next only to treatment and learning how to cope with it. The help you can get to manage your anger effectively is through methods and strategies specially tailored to tackle anger. If you happen to be lucky enough you may even be able to get rid of it permanently. When you take help in anger management you will be able to face and deal with any sort of situations effectively. You would have also learnt how react in various situations with calm.

Three of the common reactions which many people face when confronted with a stressful situation are, they either bottle up their emotions, become defensive or they begin to lash out. All these reactions are unhealthy to manage anger. When feelings are bottled up, they tend to create negative consequences in people. It may appear to be fine but the problem will be still there. The person should be prepared to deal with the situation causing anger otherwise it could turn out to be even worse. Bottling up emotions will lead to resentment which can be there for along time. It is better to deal with the problem than to accept the feeling of guilt and blame which would make the person feel bad about them. When help is taken to deal with anger management it helps individuals to cope with situations that can be challenging.

People with anger problems also go on the defensive. When ever they are faced with situations that make them angry they tend to react quickly. These people tend to react bitterly which can also produce hostile reactions from others. So going on the defensive is not an ideal way to manage anger. When help is taken in effective anger management it helps them to evaluate the situations rather than reacting to them by being defensive.

Many people also start lashing out when they confront situations which cause anger. These people use physical and verbal abuses and always act on impulse. These reactions tend to cause only negative results which are later regretted. When ever a person lashes out at someone the response they get is one of negativity. It only evokes more problems. It will be too late when they realize that their behavior did not solve any thing. Help taken from effective anger management will teach people how to control their anger and restrain themselves.

People who are serious about working on their anger can greatly benefit from effective anger management. There are many helpful anger management techniques available free for those who are interested from various sources. Those who are in need of help should realize what this could do for them. Anger management techniques will be helpful only to those who accept responsibility of themselves and would like to change their ways. When you sign up for an anger management program you are on your way to learning how to effectively control your anger and deal with difficult situations.



Stanley

Jake J Saab asked:


There are many, many positive techniques and skills related to anger management. Since anger management seems to affect so many people in society, it is imperative to design and create techniques, teach skills, provide counseling and provide appropriate care and support. Since anger issues affect individuals from childhood to adulthood, obviously it is necessary to teach anger management skills that work for every age group. For the person who is dealing daily with anger problems, it is important to learn skills that will be effective in coping.

One skill that tends to help people deal with negative emotions is acupressure. This technique used as an anger management skill is achieved by tapping or rubbing the body. Using this skill, briskly massaging the body when feeling tense and upset, causes an individual’s energy to move around their body which results in relaxation. An anger management skill or techniques known as the Emotional Freedom Technique of EFT can be combined with acupressure to fight against negative emotions. EFT works to balance the brain hemispheres to help an individual admit to their problem and find forgiveness. This anger management skill would be very beneficial in helping a person release feelings of anger and relax.

Adopting positive anger management skills might involve keeping a journal. When an individual writes about the situations which upset them, it helps to get the negative thoughts and emotions out of their head. By journaling about feelings and emotions, a person is able to rid their minds of unhealthy thinking and put them on paper. This anger management activity would provide specific details and perhaps triggers which usually set the individual off. Being able to read and review reactions to situations, a person might be capable of making changes in their behavior.

When considering anger management skills, there’s one which is quite easy to adopt. Removing themselves from a threatening situation might eliminate the problem. If a person realizes they have difficulties controlling their temper, they might consider staying away from situations which may cause heated arguments. If a person has a regular pattern of lashing out during specific conversations, they ought to avoid those incidents. Some people who have anger issues seem to go looking for a reason to get upset. If aiming to adopt anger management skills, these people should attempt to change this way of thinking. Instead of going to the problem, they ought to run from the problem.

Adopting anger management skills that work is definitely an essential step when striving to cope with feelings of rage and anger. There are many suggestions and recommendations offered on Internet sites related to anger management skills. It would certainly help to visit these sites and read the information and advice. It is unreasonable to think that a person will use all of the anger management skills suggested. However finding one that works may mean trying each of them at least once. When an individual is attempting to gain control and eliminate the negative feelings normally dictating their life, exploring anger management skills is necessary to find a technique or skill which works for them.



Tyler

Katastro asked:


I have a kid I work with that could use an anger management class. Something he could do by himself or with me, but in a group setting with other people, preferably other kids. Any ideas or resources? I guess I’m looking for websites or phone numbers – someplace where I can find classes. I live in California; looking for something in or around the Sacramento area. Willing to travel a little bit.

Eva

Jessica asked:


I work at a counseling center and we have a class for those needing Anger Management. I need an acronym for the name of the program. We were using TAME (Treatment in Anger Management Effectiveness), but the staff member who created that acronym is leaving our center and we can’t use it anymore.

Does anyone have any ideas? These can’t be derogatory or rude as we work with courts and probation ect.

Zachary

nikkita asked:


Is 21 years old too young? I know someone who is 21 and I think needs anger management and they agreed, but later got angry for me suggesting it because they are ‘too young’…. Opinions???

Jeanne

Desiree asked:


My fiance came to me and expressed concerns that he may need anger management. His work history is less than perfect because of his angry outbursts and behavior on the job. He is in the process of finding a new job but now his anger issues are taking place in our home and I do not want the situation to escalate out of control. I agreed to accompany him when he sees a counselor but I want to know what to expect. Sometimes I can express myself better through writing, so would it be a good idea for me to keep a log of his behavior to discuss with the counselor? Has anyone else ever attend couples counseling for something similar to my situation?

Clifford